A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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