i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

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how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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What happens if you go one louder? Nothing because you can't

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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wanna hear a joke? me niether.

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 encountered 7 in the Vietnam War where he killed 6's brothers, leaving him scarred. 6 has countless nightmares due to the numerous visions that reminisce that situation in great deal. Also, 7 had a big hook on his hand, which was very scary.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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