a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Lil Wayne

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We are all equal in the eyes of God.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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