Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

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What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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What's worse than World War II? World War III.

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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