Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There was a chicken. It squarked.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

thumb_up thumb_down -23

knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down -25

white or wheat? wheat please.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

thumb_up thumb_down -25

This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats two plus two Four!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops