If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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. . I am a whale

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops