Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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What does greg and Ian have in common?

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

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A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops