A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What page are you on The gay page.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

thumb_up thumb_down -16

five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops