roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

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What stops a train? A missile

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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