How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops