What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

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so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

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What's the difference between a person who can differentiate an anti-joke from a joke and one who cannot? Other than being able to tell the difference between the two types of humour, it is impossible to tell, as no further information is given.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops