Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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