Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

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what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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