- Anti Joke

one of my friends died of heartburn today :( i cant believe gav is gone

How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

What is better than tissues? Correct!

Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

What comes after Friday? A ?.

what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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