What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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Knock Knock. Shut up.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Hi

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

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What did the man think of when he saw a squadron of military bombers flying over his home? The football game is about to start

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Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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What do you say when you walk into an optical? "Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?"

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What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

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How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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Men's rights

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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wouldnt it be ironic if chuck norris was shooting blanks

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Man: You know you're crazy when you talk to inanimate objects, you know you're Insane when they reply. Stick: I know, right?

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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