Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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