Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

whats every colour and loved by everyone Mario

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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