Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

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To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

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Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

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What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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I forgot to tell you something I forgot wat it was

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how many people with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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