what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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