A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are reds violets are blue when your parents says your beautiful they're lying to you

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Has u seen my grammar?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call an blank test? an F

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the man wearing all white? He was a part of the Ku Klux Kan.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does the gay man do while he is taking a shower with many other men in a prison or a gym? Lathers soap all over his body to clean himself so he is not smelly.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A criminal walks into a bar, and shoots the bartender and has his way with the waitress. Its his bar now.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happened to the twins? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops