Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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Why did? Yes

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops