haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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