A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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cory

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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whatdumb and gay stewart price

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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PENIS that is all

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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How are black people and apples the same They both hang from trees

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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