Im about to rewrite History....... History

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why didnt the whiteperson sit down at obama's election? because he had hemorrhoids

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Wanna hear a joke? Woman's rights.

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kill yourself....with a cigarette

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Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

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A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

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what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one. It should only take one person to demonstrate such a simple task, regardless of their hair color.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Weaner

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Massie is a fatass

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A man walks into a bar. There is no one there.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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