What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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Whats black and has white cream in it? Oreos

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari. There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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