What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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