Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

like most people my age. im 27

What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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