A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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Why do bitches love cheese toast? 'Cuz bitches love cheese toast

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What happens if a black person meets a white person? They shake hands

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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a chinese man pays the full price

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

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What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops