What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

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Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

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What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

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What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

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Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

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salad days!

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Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops