Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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Why did the most interesting man in the world refuse to eat his buttered toast? It just so happens that the cook accidentally used stale bread, causing it to taste unsatisfactory.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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1+1=2

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops