why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Knock Knock. Shut up.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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Fine, ladies first.

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Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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all these jokes are horrible now

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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