A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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