- Anti Joke

What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

whats green and lives in the water

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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Drew Knowles is gay

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.