Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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Go online. why? To get a quote. why? To save money. why? Because we said so! Parenting can be hard. See how easy it is to save with GEICO.

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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