I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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I would have made you laugh, but that is not the point is it? Moral: What do you expect from the 4th most pointless invention?

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What's red and smells like metal? A tricycle. It's covered in blood.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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