What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

What is black, tastes like crap, lands in a toilet, feels soft and mushy, sometimes red, blue, yellow, purple and pink, feels very heavy. eats cookies, drinks soft drink and lights fires? A fat person in a coloured suit.

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future

If you just read this, You're dead.

Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

What happens when you have nothing to do and you can't think of a joke? You just type whatever you want and hope to god someone likes it.

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

"What did one Chinese say to each other" "I don't speak chinese.......!"

wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Did you know? . You already know!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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