How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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What do you do if you work in subway? we make the subs put meat on it then put salad on then cut it then wrap it other duites involved but cba to exsplain

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A: What is faster than a speeding bullet? B: Light

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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As a kid I was always told that school would get me good places. As an adult, I have found that there is another thing that gets you into a good place. Shrooms.

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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