What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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I am quite mature.

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why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

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If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

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Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops