A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

"hey do you know the date" "58"

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

"My CiOCK is bigger!" "No! My CiOCK is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger DiICK.

Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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