What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops