Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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what did the black guy ge for christmas? a speeding ticket

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

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Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

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A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

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Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

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A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

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A hill billy went fishing

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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