A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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Why is 16 scared of 17? Because 17, 18, 19 *crickets*

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Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Your girlfriend.

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What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didn't she get back on the swing? cause she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her up? Cause she had no friends. Why did she stay their all night? cause she had no family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops