why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

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Roses are Orange Violets are Green I'm Colorblind..

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What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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