How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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I hate you.

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

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How do you make a baby cry? You hit it in the face with a hammer.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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