How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose name was Mike

A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

Q: What Jews are doing in Palestine? A: Living.

One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

Knock Knock Come in!

How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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