Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops