What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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