I have cancer. And you're next.

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

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What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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