how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops