why did the kid die? his mom shot him

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

what is worse than a guy pissed?

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How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

What's 9+10? 19

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.