A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

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What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

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How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

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Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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Error 37.

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How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

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what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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