Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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Here come the elephants over the hill!

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

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Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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