Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

thumb_up thumb_down

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

thumb_up thumb_down

God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

thumb_up thumb_down

What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

thumb_up thumb_down

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

thumb_up thumb_down

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

thumb_up thumb_down

A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops